The Chicago Bulls black pinstripe alternate
This jersey doesn't actually make the list because the newer version is sweet, the one without pinstripes. But this uniform will get an honorable mention because pinstripes suck. This isn't fucking baseball. Pinstripes are retarded in baseball too, but this list isn't about baseball, so the Bulls get my honorable mention.
#10: The Oklahoma City Thunder
These jerseys suck. They are so generic its horrible. They look like something off a knock-off 90's basketball video game that doesn't have the rights to use real uniforms. How about some fucking creativity? And the yellow and orange is a garbage touch. Pick one, not both, just one. And not to mention that fucking paragraph across the chest. Why can't they just say "Thunder"? So much easier. They should have never left Seattle, those uni's were so sick (except their late 90's-early 2000's abortions featured at #8)..... Oh, and Kevin Durant, hit the weights you skinny bastard.
#9: The Hawks late 90's uniforms
These are ridiculous. My first example of the abortions the 90's saw in sports uniforms. From that dumb ass Hawk on the front, to the fading black-to-red, they just suck. Holy shit these are bad. I can't believe there are 8 uniforms worse than this...
#8: Seattle Supersonics, late 90's to early 2000's
I don't think anyone can argue that these suck. They look like they were designed after the drive-in or something. Enough said. Just another example of shit produced in the form of a 1990's uniform.
#7: Houston Rockets, the Charles Barkley edition
Yeah, you remember these. Holy fuck these are ridiculous. First, they violate my pinstripe rule. And second, that cartoon logo on the front is garbage, it looks like it belongs on a charity youth basketball team. And what makes them even worse is that Charles Barkley, one of the most overrated players in NBA history, wore them. I hate you Charles, but I love your retarded commentary. Keep up the good work on TNT you big dumb bitch... Once again, another example of 1990's-produced shit.
#6: Any green "St. Patrick's Day" uniform
Such a stupid idea. Wear green shoes or something. We don't need 30 green NBA teams for 2 days. The only team that should be wearing green is the Celtics, especially since their mascot is A FUCKING IRISHMAN. The other 29 teams, no excuse for wearing green. Even the Milwaukee Bucks have no excuse for wearing green, and I'll explain why a little later on.
#5: Charlotte Hornets, '89-'95
Ahhhh the top 5, the worst of the worst, and the Charlotte Hornets are well deserving of this spot. These jerseys suck on multiple levels. First, they are teal. Teal is such a pussy color it doesn't even belong in the WNBA. There is no such thing as a good looking teal uniform. Every teal uniform ever made is horrible. Not to mention the fucking pinstripes on these. Rainbow pinstripes, ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? And then they don't even continue on the shorts, only the jersey. Not only are they ugly, but the designer obviously said "fuck it" when it came to the shorts.
#4: The Pistons 1996-2001
Teal uniforms (see #5 Charlotte Hornets). But that logo may be the worst logo of all time. I guess teams feel obligated to have an animal as their mascot, even when they aren't a team named after an animal. But I guess it's hard to come up with a mascot when you are a car part. So "Horsepower" was their aim, I'm assuming. And the exhaust pipes off the "i" and "s" are fucking retarded too.
#3: The New Jersey Nets tie-dye uniforms
I'm standing by my claim that Drazen Petrovic would rather be dead than wear these ever again... And I don't blame him.
#2: The Philadelphia 76ers
When I first saw these I think I threw up in my mouth a little. Not only are they clearly gay, they were worn by that fat bastard Charles Barkley. "Now das juss terribl only a knocklhead were wear dees" ...Fuck these uniforms... Another 1990's abortion.
#1: The Milwaukee Bucks
These actually existed. This is why the Bucks are not allowed to wear green in my book. I couldn't find a picture of them actually being worn, but everything I've read confirms they were worn at least 3 times in the 1996-1997 season. I was completely ready to give the 76ers the number 1 spot, but then I came across these, and holy shit, they are bad. These could compete as the ugliest uniforms of all-time, in any sport... I just can't wait until Adidas produces these as Hardwood Classics, so I can buy one and fucking burn it... The ultimate 1990's abortion right here.
